You can’t always get what you want

I always sing the guitar rifts when I say those words, but that’s not the point to this post. If you’ve been following me this semester, you’ll know that I’ve been applying for jobs, running for homecoming royalty, and working my rear end off for my job. Throughout all of these experiences, moments, and times in my semester, I’m really learning that I can’t always get want I want.

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As bad as it sounds, I am one to believe that I deserve a lot of different things. Whether that be the extra whipped cream on a waffle or being crowned for royalty. I begin to expect these things in my life and when they don’t happen, I get genuinely upset. Now you might be thinking, “Wow, this girl is a sore loser and when she loses I bet she makes everyone around her miserable.” False. Throughout my life I’ve been taught to take a loss with class and dignity. I have been taught to be excited for the winners or simply ask for more whipped cream if I want it. One time, I lost my eighth grade 200 meter race by a tenth of a second at the district meet. Up until that point I was the fastest girl in the district. I was the sorest loser on the track that day. I was noticeably upset, I cried a lot, and I didn’t congratulate the girl who beat me (just so you understand, she beat me by tilting her head into the finish line). The next day when medals were being handed out at practice, my coaches looked at me, held up my silver medal and said in front of everyone, “Do you all think cry baby deserves this medal?” People giggled, some said no, some were like, who cares? All I know was, I was embarrassed. I looked at my coaches and apologized to them in front of my entire team.

It was the most humbling experience in my competitive life.

This lesson has stuck with me now for almost 9 years. To this day I feel ashamed of how I acted when I lost to that girl. Although I feel ashamed, I know now how to handle myself when I don’t get exactly what I expect or want.

Do I still get upset when something doesn’t work out how I planned? Yes.
Do I express those feelings publicly? No.
Do I allow myself pity time behind closed doors? Yes.

After losing homecoming, I went back to my apartment, laid in my bed from the exhaustion built from the week before, and reassured myself that it was okay I didn’t win. When things don’t go your way or how you expect them to go, the best advice I could ever give is to fake it til you make it. Life isn’t just handed to you. You can’t sit there and expect everything to go as planned. Life enjoys curveballs. Life enjoys seeing you make something out of nothing. Life enjoys watching you grow into a decent human being.

You cannot be decent if you’ve never had to put up a fake smile or show that you are genuinely happy for someone even when it’s not in your favor. Not always getting what you want makes you learn and grow.

So take it from a previous sore loser. It’s okay to lose and not get what you want. You will be better off for it.

-Cas

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Twenty something looking for inspiration, travel opportunities, and all of the dogs to cuddle.

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